Posted in Journal

“Endless Night’s Poems” on Amazon

It has been almost four months that I have put my first collection of poems on Amazon that you guys can purchased for $4.85 USD.

Endless Nigt’s Poems is the story that shows emotions: anger, desperation, love, broken heart, hope, and courage. All of the emotions are mixed in words and the words will hopefully take someone to have a courage to move on and let go.

I have enjoyed writing the poems since four five years ago and they are mostly inspired by someone’s emotion. You will read my poems as modern poems with random writing technique.

If you guys are interested, you can purchase it now on kindle on

Enjoy 🙂

Posted in Journal

Teruntuk Bulan di sana.

Halo pembaca,

Di hari Jumat ini saya ingin berbagi kerinduan saya tinggal di suatu tempat yang begitu saya rindukan saat ini. Sebuah tempat yang membuat saya ingin menjadi diri saya sendiri sebab alamnya tidak memaksa saya untuk melakukan hal di luar keinginan saya. Sebuah tempat yang tidak hanya menawarkan keindahan tetapi juga menjanjikan kenyamanan sekaligus kebahagiaan. Sebuah tempat yang jika ditinggalkan akan meninggalkan kesan yang begitu mendalam. Sebuah tempat yang ingin saya sebut namanya tetapi enggan mengejanya karena tempat itu begitu bersifat pribadi, begitu sangat intim dengan jiwa saya.

Terkadang saya berpikir untuk benar-benar meninggalkan tempat itu, merelakannya untuk tidak terlihat lagi oleh mata saya. Tapi kompromi semacam itu telah diiringi dengan duka dan kesedihan mendalam yang mendarah daging dengan nurani saya. Seolah-olah tempat itu akan betul-betul tiada, lenyap ditelan bumi.

Jadi, tolong beri tahu langit yang jauh di sana, yang ditemani bulan dan bintang di malam hari, yang disinari matahari di siang hari:

saya akan segera datang.

Posted in Journal

A Letter to Hahndorf

Dear Hahndorf,

I have not visited many places in my life time but the moment I set my foot on your land and my eyes beheld the scenery before me, I knew that I would choose you million times. Oh, Dear! I have fallen in love with your beauty and peace. It is unfair that you made me fall in love before I was given times to think. But my love, I would fall in love with you and settle into your charm.

I miss you now. I captured some memories of you I can always see. I recall what you look like during Spring time. But no matter what season you are in, you are always be the perfect place to live in.

I miss you now. And I will always do. Until we meet again.



With love,



Posted in Journal

A Cup of Coffee

Everyone starts their activities in different ways. Checking email or another social medias are common things to do after waking up. But would those things be able to really brighten up a day? I, personally, think that something else is required to make the day much brighter.

Let’s forget the sunlight which the light shines the day in the morning. The light does not always come to brighten up the day when the cloud hanging in the sky and the rain pouring down. That would make everyone have bad mood.

We need mood booster!


Some people will spare their times for 5-10 minutes to get in line just to get a cup of coffee in the morning. I do that a lot! Especially when I do not have a coffee maker at home. And some people will always find the reason why they like that particular coffee from that particular coffee shop. Even I will save couple of dollars just so I can get my coffee in the morning.

That feeling when taking the first sip of a cup coffee cannot be expressed by words properly but it sure can make you more awake. Enjoy your coffee in the morning.


Posted in Journal

God is Good

What is lost cannot be replaced. What is missed cannot be reached. What is expected cannot happen. What is wanted cannot be owned. Because we do not write our own destiny. We live it and fight for it. Yet we will find failure when we thought we have fought so hard. That just means that what you are fighting for, everything in your life that you desire, is not destined to be with you.

But how come that other people achieve it, so easily?

Because it was meant to be. That thing, whatever it is, is destined to be with them. Not with you.

Should we blame ourselves for not fighting hard enough?

No, we should not. It is not our fault. As much as we think that we are stupid enough for not getting that sort of thing, it is not our fault. We have done everything to make it work. Believe me, you have done your best! But you are not destined for that thing. Let’s cry over it. We need to shed tears for our fights to certain degree  because we will move on after that and get up to achieve something better. There is no point in being miserable over one thing while another opportunity awaits you. You will never know unless you find out.

Does that mean that we have to give up?

Do you want to give up? I do not want to. Because as long as we pursue good things, then good things will come finding us. We do not know when and how that thing will finally come to us because that is not our job to wonder. We just need to fight to certain degree until it happens. It is about time.

We have fought, then it still is not happening and we fucked up our times and missed a lot of opportunities. Why does it happen to us?

Then again, it is not destined for us. We have fought to some points that we cannot do anything else which is signed that we are not destined for it. And if we still believe in ourselves and in our dreams, then be patient!

God is good. God knows what he is doing. He knows what is right and when the right time to make it happen to us. If that is no good for us, He will not make it happen and replace it with something better unexpectedly.

Posted in Journal

Kindness is everywhere….

There it was… Friday… A good Friday.

That morning I did not bring any cash in my pocket and I forgot to stop by at ATM. I was going to the city and I was not able to catch the train earlier. The wind blew from the south, chilling my bone. I knew I had to wait for an hour until the next train came.

It was 13 degree at 9 AM. That was cold for me as I was not used to the weather under 18 degree. I missed the heat… I missed my homeland.

I was nearly freezing there. I realized that I had a book with me but a small truck in front of the station caught my attention. I could smell something nice from there. A coffee. I could sense the warm that the truck could offer me. So, I approached it and waved my hand to the Lady inside. She drew a big smile on her face to me as I asked for a cup of extra hot coffee.

“Do you accept card?” I asked.

“Oh, no. Just cash.” She replied. “Do you come here often?”

I shook my head. “No. Just today I’m going to the city and I’ll return on Monday.”

“Ah. That’s okay. You can pay on Monday.”

I was surprised. “But I’m probably coming in the afternoon.”

She dropped her smile and replace it with a little pout. “Oh, this is not going to work for you, then.”

I could hear the regret tone in her voice. Well, I regret it, too. By then I knew I was not going to get my coffee and I was not be able to go to the Bank, collecting my cash, taking risk in missing the next train. So I walked away after saying that that was okay and smiled to the Lady.

I spotted an empty couch in the corner of the station. Even though it was still cold, at least, I could get the peace and read my book. Good Grief  was my choice of book. I just borrowed it from the local library few days ago but had not been read it. So I took it out and started to unfold the soft cover of the book.

I came to page 21 when I sensed – or heard – someone was approaching me. I stopped reading, focusing my concentration on someone was coming. Then a tap on my shoulder had turned me around, to find the person smiling at me holding a cup of coffee with her left hand.

“Shshshsh,,,” she shushed me, whispering.

“But I can’t be here on Monday morning.” I stated.

“You can comeback anytime. Don’t tell anyone.” She whispered again to me with a big smile on her delicate face.

“Oh, God,” I said. “Thank you so much.”

“No worries.” then she started moving, leaving me with the cup of coffee which I was holding now.

“Hey wait,” I called her. “What’s your name?”


Thank you, Meredith.

Posted in Journal

A Glimpse of 2017

I cannot say that what will happen to me this year is unexpected because I have always expected it since the beginning of my study at University. I have worked hard to get this and I have tried many things to finally be one of the candidates. I cannot be more grateful to God; how kind He has been to me that everything I have always asked for is always granted. I cannot stop being grateful. God listens to me and helps me to go through this.

This year, I am going to be one of the Indonesian Language Assistants in Victoria, Australia. I am going to present and assist the students in learning Indonesian Language and knowing the culture. And that is a big thing which encourages me to keep learning and reading. I cannot just let my self do nothing because the four years that I have spent at University feels insufficient. I still have to advance the knowledge and enhance my skills in both teaching and learning. One of my friends said that I can go through this smoothly and I wish I could say the same because the closer the date is, the more tense I am. What should I bring? What should I actually prepare from here? How will I teach? Should I be someone else in the classroom?

I have been my self since the beginning. I do learn from the others but I always learn from myself too: my experiences. I have to find my best spot in the classroom to be who I am so I can be very comfortable when I assist the students. I have always done that in my previous classes. Because one thing I learned from my Professor is that we have to be the friend of our students to share what we have known with them, do not keep lecturing them and ruling them in the classroom to do what we want them to do as everyone has their own way of learning and we ought to discover it and respect it.

To be in Australia is one of my dreams. Although the dream has come true, what is waiting in the future is still unknown. All we can do is keep learning, keep praying, and keep trying to do our best. My achievement does not make me think that I have achieved it all. Instead, it makes me think to be better. Last year was joyful and I hope the same for this year.

Let’s be kind to the others and be kind to ourselves too. We are waiting for what is awaiting.